This website was created in the memory of our beloved brother and son, Clint Reagan, who was born in Tennessee in May 1985 and passed away in August 2005 at the age of 20. Clint is very much alive in our hearts and always will be. He is and will continue to be as much as a part of our lives in spirit as he ever was.
"The love that is in a parent's heart stays deep, strong and true. No matter where you go, that love is there with you". Quote by Edgar Cayce. 

Beautifl y Day and Clint's Birthday!!!
Alan and I thank each of you for visiting Clint's site. We hope you have a blessed day filled with precious memories. May the bright light from your child's radiant love guide your way.
I invite you to visit http://opentohope.com/ for articles on loss and grieving.

Thank you for visiting Clint's site. We want to thank everyone for the thoughts and remembrances. They warm our hearts beyond words. I hope each of you can find small moments filled with the peace and comfort. I am sure Clint is smiling down on all of us. We think he would have loved this site.
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.... It's about learning to dance in the rain."
The loss of our precious son will be with us forever, but the anguish has softened a bit. We celebrate our love for Clint's life and his spirit as we also mourn the loss of his physical presence. We are working hard to find a way to balance the pain and the love.
In the beginning the loss is so big, it is hard to find our voice. This is an unspeakable loss at first. Some days it is hard just to breath. But as you move along in the journey, we hope you can find a voice for your pain and loss. That voice can be expressed in many ways, such as: poems, art, memorials, books, songs, articles, conversations, journals, blogs, websites, service to others, crafts, pictures and physical activities.
Find your voice and trust it, because only you know what is best for you and your journey.
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I received some beautiful Picture Pocket Angel stones of Clint from a dear friend. If you would like to know more about these and to get some for yourself with your child's photo, please email Mary at
u-name-it-treasures@comcast.net

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www.listening-hearts.memory-of.com
Listening Hearts -A Gathering of Bereaved Mothers
will meet on Saturday, August 1, 2009 3:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m.
at
Baptist Eye Institute Conference Room
2020 Kay Street
Knoxville, TN 37920
Join us as we listen to our own hearts and the hearts of each other. No one should walk this journey alone, so we share with each other ways to carry the loss and the love. We share, make memorial crafts, offer friendship, understanding and hope.
We invite you to bring with you items that you would like to share with the group such as: poems, articles, and songs.
"As we learn to carry these feelings, we realize there is room in our hearts for more than the pain and anguish of separation." I hope one day you find you have peace along side of the pain. -Unknown
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"Life is continuous, and is Infinite. Death is only passing through God's other door". Quote by Edgar Cayce.
Our Clint

Everyone was so excited when Clint came into our lives that beautiful day in May. While we were at the hospital the day he was born, back home in Seymour the contractor began work on our new home. (Now every time the subject comes up about how long we have lived in this house, we think of Clint.) We were a young family with many hopes and dreams. Clint was a delightful child and made our family of four complete. He was this adorable bundle of joy and love. He was very affectionate and loved to cuddle. Clint's older brother, Blake, told every visitor, "He is our baby and you can't take him with you." That was the beginning of a brotherly love that continued throughout their lives. This was a precious time in our lives!
As Clint grew from our baby to our little boy, his love for animals grew. The line in the poem, little boys are made of snakes, snails and puppy dog tails, could have been used to describe Clint. As a small boy, he could spend the afternoon outside carrying around a caterpillar so he could share it with his dad when he got home. We purchased one hamster from the pet store and a few weeks later we had a cage full. One of his favorite things to do when he was young was to carry a baby hamster piggyback in the hood of his sweatshirt. (see photo album) We had our share of pets: dogs, cats, hamsters, a rabbit, ducks, chickens, and fish. Years later I learned the stray dog we had for 16 years had a little coaxing when she chose our house out of all the others in the neighborhood. Our pet population continued to grow. Later, Clint was so proud when he was able to locate an orange kitten that needed a home because his brother had always wanted one. Of course, he chose a kitten for himself also. Clint was always bringing home treats and toys for the cats.

Many years ago while on vacation Clint's love for fishing began. At the beach he could spend hours walking along the waters edge catching small fish in his net. (see photo album) The fish were released for another day. Once he came across a baby hammerhead shark at the shoreline. That was an exciting day for a little boy! We got a kick out of the time we were fishing from a pier, and Clint made it a fishing competition with Nanny. He tried to keep up with every fish she caught so he could make sure he caught at least one more. The conditions were right and they both caught many fish that day. I had to run back and forth putting bait on the hooks.

Clint's love for fishing continued, and a love for other sports grew. He was a team player and loved the years he played on the school basketball team. What he lacked in skill, he seemed to make up with enthusiasm. He seemed to be able to lift the spirits of his teammates whenever he went into the game. During those elementary school years, Clint also played baseball. He found pleasure in everything connected to sports; playing, watching, and collecting cards. Once we traveled to Chicago so both guys could attend a baseball game between their favorite teams and see a few of their favorite players. We also visited Shedd Aquarium and rode the "L". He later turned this experience into an award winning social studies project. Sports were always on his mind. When Clint was young, he would practice signing his name in hopes of one day being a famous baseball player that would be asked to autograph baseball cards. Perhaps now he will be the angel in the outfield.

Our son always had many good friends and they were important to him.Although, Clint was not a morning person, after a good hug he was anxious to go to school and be with those friends. (Clint freely gave hugs, but little did I know I was storing hugs that would have to last me a lifetime.) These friendships continued for years. Alan always said he thought he took Clint to every birthday party in the county. A friend shared with me recently, how Clint always brought the best birthday gifts to the parties. Although, I think Clint viewed school as a place to spend time with one's friends instead of a place to learn, he liked reading and attended summer reading programs at the local library. He also excelled in spelling and became our personal spell checker.
Clint participated in many clubs and activities. He attended YOKE Ministries after school. Each summer he looked forward to attending 4-H camp. I will never forget the first time I put him on the bus for camp. Neither will I ever forget the smell in his suitcase of wet dirty clothes when he arrived back home at the end of the week. Later, he even became a camp counselor. He found it rewarding to help the young campers that were homesick or the "homesickees" as he called them. Clint said he did it because he remembered his first time away from home and the how he felt. He loved to joke and act silly at times. Clint wanted everyone to be happy and he could always make people laugh.

During the high school years, Clint had some ups and downs. Despite this, he always had a smile. He ran track his freshman year and sports were still a part of his life. His enjoyment of fishing continued; although, it was during a fishing trip that he sustained a serious and permanent eye injury. This did not keep him from other activities. One summer, Clint visited Australia and New Zealand as a People to People Ambassador Representative. He cherished those memories and hoped to return to Australia one day. He was proud how he kept himself well when others on the trip became sick. The leaders of the trip had cautioned the parents against expecting too much communication from their child during the trip because of the busy schedule. We were pleased to hear from Clint often.

We have the memories of many family activities to hold in our hearts, but they will never be a substitute for having him here with us. Clint enjoyed many things: board games, video games, miniature golf as well as white water rafting. He also found joy in collecting items. Over the years he collected Pez dispensers and he had sizable collection of them. We learned the hard way they can be like dominoes lined up; when one fell, they would all fall.
       

We also have our memories of all the holidays and trips. Fall was probably his favorite time of the year. He looked forward to all the activities with the season; football, Halloween, corn mazes, haunted houses, and Thanksgiving. Alan, Clint and I would get up very early the day after Thanksgiving, fight the crowds and shop the sales. We felt lucky to have a teen that still wanted to go places with his parents. We even went holiday shopping one time while on vacation. Clint enjoyed shopping so much that we traveled to malls in other cities. We had discussed making a trip to the Mall of America.

But as much as Clint liked holiday shopping, Halloween was probably one of his favorite fall holidays. For several years as a family project, we would hand out candy as volunteers at the local zoo. We had plans to celebrate Halloween at Disney that October. Even though that trip never came about, we have the memories of many other family vacations. He never seemed too old to have his picture made with the characters at WDW. As a young traveler on trips, Clint always made sure we had ample opportunity to learn about the events and offerings in the area by collecting one of each brochure he came across. At times, we felt he kept the brochure industry going. We have so many precious memories to fill our hearts. We also shared many laughs over the time our luggage fell off the top of the van onto the highway.

After high school, Clint signed up to attend a community college. He had dreams of one day designing video games, but in the meantime he worked with his father at an engineering company. He considered his father his best friend. Clint spent his time like most young people: listening to music, playing video games, looking at cars, spending time with his girlfriend, talking on the phone and shopping at thrift shops for vintage T-shirts. He and his brother enjoyed watching various shows together, such as: Cops, and Orange County Choppers. They also enjoyed cutting up and just being brothers in general.

Clint also put his time and money into making custom changes to his car. He was saving money for spinners for his car. He and his girlfriend loved going to the zoo and Dollywood. Clint discussed obtaining a membership at the gym, because he wanted to become more muscular. He enjoyed attending UT football, and baseball games. He liked a variety of sports and teams. Some of his favorites were Auburn, Florida, Georgia, North Carolina and Chicago White Sox.

"Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be" (Psalm 139:16).
We were blessed to have shared a wonderful childhood with Clint and to have had 20 years together. But, our beloved son and brother left us too soon. We miss his big hugs and bright smiles so much. We miss his singing, his whistling, his laughs, and the smell of his favorite cologne. We also miss the joyous moments he brought to the family. We still look for him to come walking through the door, instead he walks through our hearts. One always knew when Clint was in the room. Heck, one knew when he was anywhere in the house. We miss the way he filled a room and filled the house. Edna St. Vincent Millay wrote, "The presence of that absence is everywhere". This is very true for us also.

Clint always had a tender heart and generous nature. He had been encouraging a dear and special friend to make contact with estranged family members. He always seemed to have encouraging words to offer to others. One of his favorite movies was Pay It Forward. In his honor we hope to pay forward acts of kindness.
"When our mortal eyes close on this world for the last time, our angels open our spiritual eyes and escort us personally before the face of God." -Eileen Elias Freeman, "The Angels' Little Instruction Book"

This page is intended to introduce you to Clint and to give you a hint of the son and brother we all knew and loved. To learn more about his struggles and death, read the section labeled medical information listed under the legacy section.
"To meet and to part is the story of life, and to part and meet is the glory of life."
"What is Life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night". - Crowfoot, Blackfoot warrior and orator, 1890

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After Clint died, our transformation from the life we had planned to the life we have now began when a counselor suggested we find our local Compassionate Friends group. Their national site, http://www.compassionatefriends.org, had a link to the Internet talk show called Healing the Grieving Heart. I still find this show to be very helpful. In fact it was through that show that I came to know about this Memory-of site.
Drs. Gloria and Heidi Horsley now have two sites:
http://opentohope.com offers articles about grief and loss.
http://thegriefblog.com gives grievers a chance to reach out to one another.
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Below is a lovely drawing of Clint done by a friend for Father's Day. If you would like more information on a drawing of your child, feel free to contact him at the email address below. He is a wonderful and caring young man with a family and I am sure funds made from his beautiful art will go towards a good cause, his own precious little one.
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No one is gone until they are forgotten. And Clint will not be forgotten.
Forever Loved and Forever Missed
This is one of Clint's favorites pictures. He labeled it Sexy Man.
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